Not Watching The Football

If you've read Customer Service and Signing Up, you'll know the troubled time I've had of it trying to get football on my telly. After finally getting everything installed, I expected to find that actually watching the football would be a breeze. After all, I'm an experienced arm chair fan. Sadly, it's been fraught with problems.

I settled down to watch England v Austria (or whoever it was) the other week at about 1am. About ten minutes into the game, I discovered that I was feeling rather drowsy, and had no idea whether I'd make it to half time without having a little bit of a doze. I gave in to it. I set my phone alarm to go off just before half time so I'd catch the first half highlights.

However, when my alarm went off I glanced at the telly, only to discover that the adverts were on. Even before the ad break had finished, I felt my eyes closing again, so quickly set my alarm for just before the end of the game.

This time, my alarm didn't even go off.

Instead, I was woken up by a long, unbroken, high pitched tone, and looked at the telly, only to discover that the game was over, and the channel had shut down.

I dragged myself disconsolately to bed.

I thought I'd fare better on Sunday, when Spurs v Chelsea kicked off at the more acceptable hour of 11pm. This time I managed to sit through the entire game, and wished I'd fallen asleep. A dour 0-0 draw.

I dragged myself disconsolately to bed.

The next day, I saw an interview with Chelsea coach Jose Mourhino. He was scathing about Spurs' lack of ambition, and finished his interview with the comment:

"In my country, when a team comes only to defend, we say they brought the bus, and parked the bus in front of goal."

This took him all of five seconds to say, and was 100% more entertaining than the 90 minutes I'd endured the night before.

I'm beginning to think that tennis might not be such a bad idea after all...